This is something probably best appreciated by my fellow chemistry geeks (I heard this first, in fact, from my chemistry teacher), but anyone can get a laugh out of it...
have recently been discovered. A description of their properties follows:
Element Name: WOMAN
Atomic Weight: Don't even go there!!
Chemical Properties: Very active. Highly unstable. Possesses strong affinity to gold, silver, platinum, and precious stones. Violent when left alone. Able to absorb great amounts of exotic food. Turns slightly green when placed next to a better specimen.
Usage: Highly ornamental. An extremely good catalyst for dispersion of wealth. Probably the most powerful income reducing agent known.
Caution: Highly explosive in inexperienced hands.
Element Name: MAN
Atomic Weight: 180 +/- 50
Chemical Properties: Attempts to bond with Wo any chance it can get. Also tends to form strong bonds with itself. Becomes explosive when mixed with Kd (element: child) for prolonged period of time. Neutralize by saturating with alcohol.
Usage: None known. Possibly good methane source. Good samples are able to produce large quantities on command.
Caution: In the absence of Wo, this element rapidly decomposes and begins to smell.